Croissants

Chapter 1: The Dragon Magnet


Once upon a time in a village high in the mountains the people lived in constant fear of one thing: the dragon. Although no one alive had seen the magnificent beast, the stories of its terrible wrath lived on. The village, in all other areas, was much like any other village. It had fair maidens and valiant knights, at least, that is how they saw themselves as they trained to defeat the beast. There were bakers and blacksmiths and tailors and all the workings of a happy village.

There was one unusual profession though, the dragon spotter. There were always signs before a dragon attack and the dragon spotter was trained to remember and recognize anything that could mean the return of the dragon. Due to years of inactivity, the dragon spotter had turned into more of a storyteller than anything. He spent his days high up in the mountains above the village hunting and scouting and remembering his training. And in the evenings, he would regale the villagers with tales of the past. All the children loved to hear of the dragon, although the parents were a little more cautious in their enjoyment. Their grandparents remembered the fear of the flames, something that was quickly being lost due to time.

Even though it had been almost one hundred years since the last dragon sighting, the dragon spotter was vigilant. He had to be, for dragons are tricky beasts. As soon as you let your guard down they will strike. A dragon, as you may remember, is in fact the most tricky of creatures due to its longevity and its shape shifting. It is difficult to spot a dragon if it can talk to you as a man. There are a few signs that will indicate something is amiss, even when a dragon is in human form. The slight smell of sulfur. The historic look of their clothing. The sudden peaks in aggression. The desire to collect and hoard shiny and beautiful things. The dragon will attempt to blend into the community, but certain temptations will be too strong to overcome.

This is why, in the center of the village there is a dragon magnet. Not a typical magnet, no this is a trap, specifically designed to lure dragons into the open. The dragon magnet of this generation (they change it every decade or so) is a beautiful sculpture of a maiden. It was crafted out of stone and coated in gold, so that it shimmers, even in the night. The villagers each contribute to the maintenance of the dragon magnet so that it always shines brightly. Theoretically, if the dragon magnet is strong enough, as soon as the dragon enters the village, even in human form, he will be helplessly drawn to the sculpture and enter into a daze as he stares at the beauty of the maiden. This will allow the villagers to gather their weapons and capture the dragon, with minimal bloodshed.

This tradition began hundreds of years ago, when an actual beautiful maiden was sitting at the center of the village, braiding flower crowns for the little girls as their mothers completed their shopping. A stranger smelling of sulfur did in fact enter the village and was immediately drawn to the innocent maiden. He sat for some time transfixed by her sweet smiles, until the dragon spotter noticed his presence and the villagers began their sneaky attack. Unfortunately the maiden was unaware of her importance in the capture of the dragon and due to his unnerving stare, began to feel increasingly uncomfortable. At last, she could stand his presence no more and excused herself from the town square to go home and made some rolls for dinner. By the time the villagers were in place to capture the dragon, he had slipped away back into the mountains.

The villagers decided that they could work with this weakness and created the dragon magnet. A sculpture that would not be harmed, even if their bait worked, instead of a living maiden was permanently placed in the center of the village. That first maiden never knew how close she was to being taken away and added to the dragon’s treasure, but her rolls did turn out beautifully that day for she took out her unease in the kneading process. These are the rolls she made.


Croissant Recipe:


Recipe was inspired by: https://www.kingarthurbaking.com/recipes/bakers-croissants-recipe with a few changes.

Ingredients:

Dough:

  • 2 large eggs + enough warm water to make 2 cups of liquid

  • 1/4 cup sugar

  • 6 to 7 cups All-purpose Flour

  • 2 1/4 teaspoons instant yeast

  • 2 tablespoons butter, melted

  • 1/2 cup milk, warmed

  • 1 scant tablespoon salt

Butter:

  • 16 Tablespoons butter

  • ½ cup all-purpose flour


Instructions:

  1. In a large bowl, combine the egg/water mixture with the sugar and yeast. Let rest 5 ish mins while yeast wakes up.

  2. Once the yeast mixture is frothy, add the butter, milk, yeast and about 3 cups of flour. Mix thoroughly. Gradually add the rest of the flour until the dough is a nice, soft but workable consistency (not too sticky.)

  3. Knead the heck out of it. It should knead nicely, add flour if it’s sticking to your hands. Knead until the dough is smooth and elastic.

  4. Let the dough rest in the refrigerator for 30 ish mins while you prepare the butter.

  5. Cut the butter into chunks of about 1 Tablespoon. Dump butter chunks and flour into a mixer and beat until thoroughly combined, but stop before the butter gets fluffy.

  6. Spread out parchment paper or wax paper or whatever you so desire. Mold the butter mixture into an 8 inch square on the paper. Stick in the fridge to solidify for 30 ish mins.

  7. Take out your dough and roll into a 9 inch square. Place butter on top of dough at a diagonal. Bring the corners of the dough to the middle to completely seal the butter in.

  8. Roll out the dough/butter envelope to a large rectangle about ½ inch thick. Fold dough like a letter. Repeat the rolling and folding like a letter.

  9. Place in the fridge to chill for 30 mins to 1 hour.

  10. Repeat steps 8 and 9.

  11. Cut your dough in half, keep half in the fridge while you work.

  12. Roll out the dough into a large rectangle, cut into three rectangles, then into six triangles. Cut a notch at the base of each triangle and roll up into classic croissant shape.

    1. Side note, my rolling was not exact and my croissants were not perfectly shaped and they still taste great soooo yeah.

  13. Repeat with other half of dough and rest all your lil croissants in the fridge for 30 mins

  14. Proof your croissants at room temperature for 60-90 mins, until they’re nice and poofy.

  15. At the end of your proof, heat the oven to 425 degrees.

  16. Bake at 425 for 10 mins, then lower the temp to 350 for another 10-15 mins.

  17. Eat all the buttery, flaky goodness.


Note: These rolls freeze well after baking.